Wedding Guidelines
CONTENTS
- Compiling Documents
- The Type of Wedding Ceremony
- Wedding Stipend
- Wedding Rehearsal
- Digital Services
- Video & Photographs In Church
- Confetti
- Flowers & Décor
- The Wedding Ceremony
- Common Instructions
- Tips and Gifts
- Dress Code
- Days/Times When There Will Be No Celebration of Weddings
- Refreshments
- Booking of Your Wedding
1.1 REQUIREMENTS BY THE CHURCH FOR A CATHOLIC WEDDING:
i) Baptismal Certificate extracts of both parties, issued within six months of the proposed date of marriage, obtained from the church where your baptism took place. It should indicate that there are no impediments to your intended marriage and that you are free to receive the sacrament of matrimony.
This requirement is applicable to all Christian baptisms and is not restricted to Catholic baptisms only.
ii) Confirmation certificate is separately required for Catholics, if confirmed, but not indicated on the baptismal certificate.
iii) Proof of freedom to marry. For Christians, this should be indicated in your baptismal extracts. A letter of consent from a parent / legal guardian is required if either party is a minor.
iv) Pre-nuptial Investigation Form should be completed with your parish priest and signed by all parties. The form records when you were received into the Church at Baptism and then Confirmed. It also indicates that you are free to marry and helps identify any special permission that you might need. It also affirms that as a mature adult you understand the nature of marriage and accept the duties and responsibilities of married life. The individually completed forms of the bride and groom are sent to the parish priest of the Church where the wedding is taking place and after the wedding the forms are kept in the parish archives.
v) Certificate of Attendance at the Marriage Preparation Course (Pre- Cana classes) – photocopy
The Catholic Church requires all couples wishing to get married to attend the Marriage Preparation Course (Pre-Cana classes). Kindly hand over, to the parish priest, a copy of the certificate that is given to you upon completion of attendance at the pre-Cana classes. The parish priest will send this document along with other relevant documents to the church where the wedding will be held.
vi)Details of witnesses: The two witnesses who are attesting at your wedding need to be above the age of 21 years and, preferably, be either of Catholic or Christian faith. They should witness the actual exchange of wedding vows and thereafter sign the marriage register at the end of the ceremony.
It is a requirement that at least one of the two witnesses be a citizen of Sri Lanka with a local address.
vii) In the event a civil marriage ceremony has already taken place with prior permission from the Bishop’s House, a photocopy of the marriage certificate and the permission letter need to be produced.
viii) Photo copies of your National Identity card / Passport / Driving License
Please ensure that all the above documents are handed over to the parish office at least two weeks prior to the wedding day.
Please also hand over the Wedding Rehearsal slip signed by the couple and the trainer to the parish office prior to the wedding.date, place, etc. and make the payment for the Government marriage certificate. You should receive your Notification of Marriage two weeks after notice is given. Please hand over the pink slip along with the receipt obtained to the parish office.
1.2 CIVIL REQUIREMENTS – REGISTERING OF THE MARRIAGE
You will need to give notice of your marriage to the Registrar of Marriages within three months before your wedding day. When this is being done, please inform the attending officer that your marriage will take place in a Catholic Church. You are required to provide the registering officer with certain details such as the wedding date, place, etc. and make the payment for the Government marriage certificate. You should receive your Notification of Marriage two weeks after notice is given. Please hand over the pink slip along with the receipt obtained to the parish office.
(i) Nuptial Mass: where both parties are Catholic.
(ii) Nuptial Mass for mixed communion: where one party is Catholic and the other is Christian from a main line church.
(iii) Wedding Service: where one party is Catholic and the other is non-Christian.
The part where you declare your marriage vows is the same in each type of wedding ceremony and they are both joyful and meaningful celebrations. You may find it helpful to discuss the type of ceremony applicable for you with your priest.
Please note that only Catholics can receive Holy Communion.
2.1 THE WEDDING LITURGY
The liturgy forms the most important part of your wedding ceremony which includes;
(i) The First Reading:
- Reading – Please select a suitable reading in consultation with the celebrant. It could be either from the Old Testament or the New Testament.
- Responsorial Psalm – The Psalm could be either recited or chanted. Please note that the Responsorial Psalm cannot be replaced with a hymn.
- Acclamation – please select a suitable Gospel Acclamation from the Lectionary.
(ii) Gospel Reading: by the celebrant.
(ii) Prayer of the Faithful/Intentions: Please prepare not more than 4 prayers/intentions.
Soft copies of wedding readings and sample prayer of the faithful can be emailed to you on your request.
2.2 THE CELEBRANT
Non-parishioners should obtain the services of a Catholic Priest of their choice for the wedding mass / service and a letter of acceptance from the celebrant should be presented along with the other documents.
2.3 THE READERS (LECTORS)
You will need two lectors (for the first reading and the intentions/prayer of the faithful) who can read clearly and confidently, to proclaim the word of God. It is compulsory that readers are of Catholic faith only.
Instructions to readers:
- The reader should approach the middle of the sanctuary with reverence and must genuflect/bow before the tabernacle, prior to approaching and when leaving the lectern.
- The reading must be done from the Lectionary available in the church or from the Holy Bible. Reading from a sheet of paper or a digital device is not permitted.
- All readers should prepare for the readings and must attend the wedding rehearsal with one of our trained volunteers.
2.4 THE ALTAR SERVERS
At least one altar server will be assigned to your wedding service/mass when you have finalised the date and time of your wedding, provided the time is not during school hours.
2.5 THE CHOIR
You may wish to contact one of the choirs of St. Theresa’s Church to sing at your wedding mass. Please speak to the choir leader at least two months prior to your wedding day to book their services.
Details of Choirs which sing at St. Theresa’s Church.
| Name of the Choir Leader | Contact No. | Charges Rs. | Meeting Day (Sunday) |
| Duleep Fernando | 0777760474 | 60,000/- | After 6: 30 p.m. Mass |
| Asith Amerasinghe | 0776632568 | 60,000/- | After 5:00 p.m. Mass |
| Priyadarshani (Sinhala) | 0756536482 | 15,000/- | After 7:00 a.m. Mass |
| Santhiyago Michael (Tamil) | 0716434746 | 15,000/- | After 9:45 a.m. Mass |
If you are using a choir that do not belong to St. Theresa’s Church, please note that they will need to bring their own instruments and sound systems. Please inform our church office in advance and obtain setting up instructions accordingly.
2.6 THE WEDDING HYMNS AND MUSIC
You may provide music for the arrival of the groom, the retinue and the bride. Please consult the choir leader to help you select suitable hymns and music which are familiar to the choir and the organist.
You will need to select the hymns for:
- The Entrance Hymn
- Lighting of individual candles (optional)
- Offertory Hymn
- Lighting of the Unity Candle (optional)
- Communion Hymn
- Final Hymn
- Signing of the Marriage Register (optional)
2.6.1 THE LIST OF RESTRICTED SONGS/HYMNS DURING THE WEDDING CEREMONY:
Please do not allow the choirs to sing these in your liturgical celebrations.
- From this moment
- You by me side
- You raise me up
- I bless the day I found you
- She wears my ring
- Because you love me
- Let it be
- Prayer
- My soul is lost so
- I saw raindrops
- I will be Yahweh
- Yahweh I know you are near
- Yahweh’s love is
- I will praise my God in the morning
- Truly Yahweh
- Peace is flowing like a river
- The chimes of time
- I have lived a life of sin
- There is a new world somewhere there
- Yahweh you are comfort
- I believe for every drop of rain
- I do not know about tomorrow
- Far beyond the star
- Do you see
- Christmas time
- Ding dong
- Put your hand
- On the wings
- From a distance
All expenses incurred by the church relating to items such as hosts, wine and other sacristy services and the use of sacristy equipment and vestments, salaries for the workers, cleaners and cleaning equipment are met with the contributions you make. For parishioners, the minimum charge for the use of the church is Rs. 30,000/-, and for non-parishioners it is Rs. 40,000/-.
The generous contributions made for wedding services and your continued co-operation in this regard are essential for the continued upkeep of the church.
We appreciate that the parishioners and worshippers who frequent St. Theresa’s Church come from a wide spectrum of social and economic backgrounds. While our fees are calculated to meet actual expenses incurred, we understand that some may find these charges beyond their means. Therefore, in an effort to accommodate those from within our community who are unable to meet the stipend, we encourage you to speak with the Parish Priest should financial consideration be a concern and a suitable concession could be arranged accordingly.
Nonetheless, kindly note that the use of the church and its grounds is a privilege and the actual costs incurred in returning to the original state any damage caused, consequential or otherwise, by your wedding party and guests must be reimbursed on presentation of invoices.
The rehearsal is best done few days prior to the wedding day.
Your wedding rehearsal should be conducted by the trained volunteers of St. Theresa’s Church. Depending on the language of your wedding ceremony, please contact the relevant volunteer/s from list below (in English, Sinhala or Tamil).
- Volunteers for the Wedding Rehearsals
English – Aromi (0777 799 809), Sureeni (077 537 8585)
Sinhala – Stella (077 450 0408), Chandrika (077 872 3397)
Tamil – Kasthuri (077 344 4125), Shanthi (077 898 0897)
Please set the rehearsal date at least one month before your wedding day as it should be a date and time convenient to the trained volunteer and you. The rehearsal should not last more than 1 hour.
Required parties for the rehearsal;
| The rehearsal will not take place if anyone from this category is not present |
- The bridal couple
- Readers
- Maid of Honour
- Best man
- Parents of the couple
- Retinue
- Representative from the choir (optional)
We request that all parties required be punctual for the rehearsal. Please instruct those attending the wedding rehearsal, including non-Christian relatives and friends, about the sanctity of the church. The consumption of food, telephone conversations and chatting in the church during the rehearsal is strictly forbidden.
If the readers you have selected wish to have a separate practice reading, please ensure that there is no one else present in the sanctuary at the time.
5.1 POWERPOINT PRESENTATION
It is possible to arrange a presenter to create slides for your wedding mass (in English, Sinhala or Tamil) to guide the congregation through the mass. A separate charge is applicable for this service. Please contact the parish office for more details.
The charges are as follows:
Hymns and Mass Rs. 3,000/-
Hymns only Rs. 1,500/-
Mass only Rs. 1,000/-
If you wish to have a presentation, you should inform the Parish Office at least two (2) weeks prior to the wedding and discuss the contents and details.
5.2 LIVE STREAMING
Live streaming of your wedding ceremony is available via YouTube for a minimum cost of Rs. 15,000/-
Please contact the parish office for more details.
* Kindly ensure that you obtain receipts from the office for all payments made.
We request that you advise your photographers to respect the sacred precincts of the church and the solemnity of the occasion as they carry out their tasks.
Please note that:
- Photographing the congregation during a solemn moment of the Eucharist is forbidden, such as during the Eucharistic prayer and Homily.
- Photographers are not permitted to enter the sanctuary for any reason at any given time.
We regret to inform you that the use of confetti, flower petals and rice are not allowed inside the church, as the cleaning up effort is too overwhelming. We have also had unfortunate incidents of our older parishioners slipping and falling on the confetti strewn on the aisle.
- A maximum of four arrangements are permitted to be displayed in the sanctuary area.
- One arrangement could be placed in front of the altar at the ground level. The altar and tabernacle should be in full view of the congregation at all times.
- Oil lamps, candles and glassware are not allowed on the aisle or elsewhere in the church.
- Affixing nails or implements for hanging/suspending decor are not allowed anywhere in the church. Affixing nails or implements for hanging/suspending decor are not allowed anywhere in the church.
- Decorations on the pews should be attached with elastic bands or ribbons. The use of cello-tape or wires is not permitted.
- All flower arrangements should be placed on rubber mats.
- Linking pews with drapes or obstructing the pews is not allowed.
- NO ARCHES ARE PERMITTED INSIDE THE CHURCH.
If you so wish, a decorated arch can be placed at the entrance to the church. Besides this, no arches are allowed inside the church.
If your wedding is held on a Saturday evening, please ensure that you do not remove the arrangements that are within the sanctuary, so that they can be used for the Sunday Liturgy.
Kindly co-operate with the church workers to ensure the cleanliness and beauty of the church at all times.
It is extremely important that all unused arrangements and/or parts of the decorations are taken away by the florists.
Kindly provide the details of your wedding floral decorator to the church office.
9.1 SETTING THE TIME FOR THE CEREMONY
Please keep in mind that the time for the ceremony given by church is the time that the ceremony begins (with the entrance hymn). Your guests should be in the church at least 15 min before the scheduled time for the ceremony.
9.2 PUNCTUALITY
We urge that you please be punctual for your wedding ceremony in order to avoid exclusion of any hymns, homily etc. to finish the ceremony in time for other scheduled commitments.
9.3 ENTRANCE PROCESSION
(i) THE GROOM AND GROOMSMEN
The groomsmen, groom and groom’s parents should enter the church about 10 minutes before the ceremony begins (Entrance Hymn).
(ii) THE BRIDAL RETINUE
The ring-bearer, page boys, flower girls followed by the bridesmaids will enter the church about 5 min before the ceremony begins.
(iii) ENTRANCE OF THE BRIDE
The bride, usually escorted by the father or both parents enters church on the scheduled time.
9.4 THE SACRAMENT OF MARRIAGE
This is the core of the wedding ceremony where you promise to commit yourselves to one another before God. Your focus should be on each other during the Sacrament especially when exchanging your vows.
We strictly remind Catholic couples (or Catholic party) to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation, before your wedding so as to be in a state of grace to receive the Sacrament of Marriage.
9.5 UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY
If you wish to have a Unity Candle ceremony, you may purchase a set of personalized candles and arrange it outside of the sanctuary on the right side near the railings (Groom’s side).
- Lighting individual candles – This is done before the service/mass begins either during or after the entrance hymn.
- Lighting of the Unity Candle – The Unity Candle is lit after the rite of marriage/exchange of rings.
9.6 OFFERTORY
Please check with the Parish office what can be offered in the offertory procession.
- In a Nuptial mass, the bridal couple can carry bread and wine (cruets and ciborium) during the offertory.
- In a service, the bridal couple can offer anything else.
9.7 HOLY COMMUNION
The priest will walk up to the couple to give Holy Communion. Others will kneel at the railing to receive Holy Communion. In a wedding service, the non-Catholic will also kneel during communion and the priest will bless him/her but should not receive communion.
Only the Catholics can receive Holy Communion.
Please be mindful that you have just received the Holy Eucharist, and due reverence needs to be given to the moment. Therefore please refrain from talking to each other.
Please instruct other parties attending your wedding ceremony accordingly.
9.8 REGISTRATION
Registration happens immediately after the mass, on the left-side of the altar (bride’s side). The couple followed by the retinue, parents and witnesses should walk to the registration table arranged on the side after the Final Hymn.
- Refrain from talking to one another during the Service, especially after receiving Holy Communion.
- Everyone (all Catholics) should participate in the mass and answer the prayers with reverence.
- If it is a service, the non-Catholic party should, as a sign of respect, follow the Catholic party in sitting, standing or kneeling when required during the mass (Presentation slides are recommended)
- Non-Catholics should not receive holy communion or not do any readings at the mass
- Refrain from using any electronic/digital devices and engaging in any kind of telephone conversations within the church either before, during or after the ceremony.
Please note that we do not tolerate the offering of tips or gifts to church staff for carrying out special favors. We insist that this practice is very strictly enforced and expect you to respect this rule at all times. This practice could result in the cancellation of your wedding ceremony.
Please keep in mind when you select your bridal and bride’s maids attire that it should be appropriate and suitable for church. Bridesmaids should be comfortably dressed to be able to assist the bride during the ceremony.
Please remember that you are in God’s presence, therefore please refrain from wearing immodest, conspicuous and inappropriate clothing to Church. It is essential that modesty and decorum are exhibited in keeping with the propriety required for the solemnity of the ceremony.
¤ On Sundays and on days of Obligation.
¤ During the season of Lent.
¤ During the season of Advent, between 17th December – 25th December
The structure located in front of the church or one of the parish halls can be reserved and used to serve light refreshments after the marriage ceremony.
Please ensure that the garden/hall is free of refuse and is left clean after use.
Charges:
- i) Open structure : Rs. 20,000/-
- ii) Parish Halls : Rs. 20,000/-
If there is another service after your wedding, any kind of music, or playing of instruments is not permitted. If not, you are permitted to use soft music.
No alcohol is to be served.
Please feel free to contact our office staff for any bookings/clarifications. The office is open from Tuesday to Sunday during the following times:
Tuesday : 8.00am – 12.30pm
Wednesday to Friday : 8.00am – 5pm
Saturday and Sunday : 8.00am – 12.30pm
3.30pm – 6.30pm
Our contact information:
Phone: 011-2583425/ 2502530/ 5516116
Email: stcitclub@gmail.com
Website: www.sttc.lk